Ring out the old, ring in the new with Blue Reviews festive suggestions and predictions for Portman Road in 2008.
Jim Magilton
Jim got his xmas present early this year - a spanking new contract out of all proportion to his managerial experience. Whatever happens now Jim will be a winner in 2008. If Town go up, he'll be sacked for taking them to the bottom of the Prem. If (as is considerably more likely) Town sink into mid-table obscurity he'll be sacked. Either way, he'll be handsomely rewarded and never have to work again... apart from on a bit of punditry on Sky.
As Jim celebrates his good fortune with a New Year Bushmills, I hope he makes at least one resolution - and that is to stop dithering and pick a settled team. I can't help thinking that one of the reasons behind Town's inept away form is his constant tinkering. So come on Jim, injuries permitting, name your best side and stick with it for a month.... It might even work.
Marcus Evans
Marcus also got an early xmas present - and a sale bargain too- one slightly shop-soiled football club. As Marcus hides behind the curtains at Evans Towers, so he could watch is family opening their presents without being seen, I do hope somebody bought him a visibility cloak for xmas. Call me old-fashioned, but whilst it is OK for the boss of an overhyped junket organising company to hide himself away, once he ventures into the public domain and buys a piece of public property, he really should stick his head above the parapet every once in a while.
As Marcus tucks into his pina colada this new year I hope he makes a resolution not to get too tired of his new toy before the cricket season starts. It may be broken and slightly careworn - but it can be fixed.
David Sheepshanks
As Sheepy passes the port round the dining table at Sheepy Towers, I do hope he has resignation, rather than 'Oh come all ye faithful' on his mind. I do feel sorry for Mrs Sheepshanks at xmas - what do you get for somebody who loves himself so much? My suggestion would be a very large piece of humble pie.
With the club now destitute and under off-shore ownership, there is really only one resolution Sheepy needs to make. So come on Sheepy - no man could have done more to destroy the credibility of Ipswich Town - at least have the decency to quit now you have cast the club adrift under offshore ownership. Resign - pleeeeeeeease!
Pablo
Ole Pablo, your second spell at Town has been something of a revelation. As you tuck into some well-deserved amontillado and cava this xmas, my hope is that the second division's leaky defences will give you 20 goals this season.
My other hope for Senor Counago is that his New Year resolution is to pass on his mantle of Town's invisible man at away games to our shy new owner and stand up and be counted.
Festive oldies and weepies
Where would the festive season be without rehashed rubbish on television and olde films that whilst good in their day, now seem a little careworn unless viewed through an alcoholic haze?
Having a sober look at the first team squad at Portman Road is a little like that. One of the reasons the club managed to lose over £2million whilst not paying interest on its debts is the vast number of players who clearly have no future - but take home a wage out of all proportion to their ability.
Whether it is overhyped youths who will clearly never make it (Yes Dean, that's you), aging Dutchmen who should have been released at least a year ago, Canadian wing sensations who arrived in a blaze of publicity for no apparent reason, any of a number of identikit midfielders of wildly diverse ages and nationalities, surplus goalies who looked like the last player who needed replacing... whichever way you look at it there is a log jam of 'talent' at Portman Road that needs thinning out urgently if Jim is to make good, mad or indifferent signings, or perish the thought, give some genuinely promising players an extended run in the team. Am I alone in hoping that the three wise men from the Marcus Evans investment group might be bringing some secateurs to prune out dead wood as their festive gift?
Blue Review
Well seeing as it is xmas I will add my hopes and wishes for 2008. Before the season started I thought Town would come below Norwich, above Colchester and finish 14th. With the second division proving such a sea of mediocrity this year, given a few home lapses all this is still possible. But whilst I don't think Town will get anywhere near the play-off places, I suspect that a top half finish is now probable.
Unlike most Town fans I am not exactly enthused by Town allegedly having money to spend on new players. You see, I remember the complete rubbish we bought last time we rushed into buying players we didn't need without thinking of the impact it would have on a settled, half-decent side. I also remember the incompetent, arrogant buffoons who were in charge of the club at the time - and the disastrous mess they created. On the one hand those arrogant buffoons are telling us that (this time) the money will be spent carefully. On the other hand, before you can say Finidi George, it appears we are interested in signing Laurent Robert. Well it is the pantomime season.
Blue Review
So what are my hopes for 2008? I fervently hope that Magilton adds just one or two decent players to an already decent team to see if it can get into the play offs. A centre half perhaps....maybe even Darren Ambrose. I expect he won't - and I expect he'll be sacked sooner rather than later to make way for a 'proven winner'.
I uberfevervently hope Sheepy will resign. But I suspect he'll stick around and be doing even more freeloading at the FA. Maybe Marcus Evans will sack him for sweet FA incompetence if our £4.5 million a year national manager can't pilot England past Andorra and Kazakstan.
So this time next year I expect us to be exactly where we are now. In this division, hoping for promotion - but with a stronger team. Just doing that and effectively standing still really depends on us doing better than bigger clubs with richer more visible 'benefactors' behind them. Which, given the serial incompetence of the last five years is quite an achievement.
Happy New Year everybody!
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